Breakdown
by Sexy Scottish Accent
Summary: AU Oneshot songfic. Based on Breakdown by Daughtry. Padme comes home very late from a Senate meeting, and things take a turn for the worse....


Hello, everyone. This fic is very AU, in two senses: 1) Padme doesn't get pregnant, so ANH and beyond don't happen 2) Anakin is very OOC. I was reading Star Wars fanfic and listening to my iPod, when Breakdown, by Chris Daughtry, and suddenly, inspiration hit me like a slap on the face. So, naturally, I had to write it. It's rated for abuse.

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Padme inhaled deeply as she gently opened the age-worn book. It was one of the few pieces of Nubian culture she had in her Coruscanti apartment, excluding her wardrobe. She read off the first sentence as she remembered why she owned this book. It told of Naboo's history, which was the main reason she'd loved it; Padme absolutely adored history. She could be told any story about anyone or anything's past and she would immediately soak it up. Maybe that was why she could remember almost anything she was told or that she heard. But that didn't matter anymore. All she wanted to do right then was to forget. Everything. She didn't care if she had a mental breakdown. Padme hugged the age-old book to her chest. 'Anything is better than this,' she thought miserably. Something wet fell on her arm, and it took a few seconds for her to realize that it was tears mixed with blood. Sobs racked her body as memory of the night before flooded over her.

* * *

It had been a long day in the Senate, even for patient Senator Amidala. She had been very fidgety, earning quite a few stares from nearby senators, and she'd nearly fallen asleep during Chancellor Palpatine's closing speech. All in all, she was very glad to be going home. 

It was nearly three in the morning by the time the door to Padme's apartment slid open and she trudged in. Her shoes scuffed the duratile as she made her way to the cooler unit. She hadn't had anything to eat or drink in eight hours, and frankly, she was starving. Upon opening the cooler unit, however, the shelves were empty save a half-empty carton of Jawa juice. 'Better than nothing,' was her thought as she downed the remainder of the refreshment. Padme wiped her mouth off as she walked to the room she shared with her husband. She expected Anakin to either be meditating or sleeping. Most likely the latter, but there had been occasions where she had walked in on his meditation. But as she entered the room, she was taken by complete surprise to find him pacing angrily with his arms folded across his chest. As the door closed, he turned and walked towards her.

"Where have you been?" he asked cautiously, as if he was restraining his voice.

Padme frowned slightly. "I thought I told you: we had an emergency Senate meeting."

"It sure seemed to last longer than usual. Four hours longer."

"We ran over."

_I'm tired of all the lines,  
Convictions and your lies.  
What right do you have to point at me? _

"Really?" His voice was filled with suspicion. "Care to explain this, then?" His finger landed just to the lower right of her lips.

She headed to the 'fresher to look in her reflector. The mirrored image showed her that her lipstick had been smudged around her mouth. Anakin spoke from the doorway.

"It's funny...while you were at your 'Senate meeting,' Obi-Wan was also...unavailable."

Padme saw what he was getting at. She almost laughed – this was ridiculous. But he was being dead serious.

"What are you talking about? That's just a coincidence, I'm sure-"

"Coincidence? This has happened before, Padme. Just last week, I tried to comm. him while you were at a 'meeting,' but he never answered. And he always answers," he finished threateningly.

Padme fought the urge to roll her eyes. Anakin was being immature. Again. "Ani, I promise you, I'm not cheating on you."

"_Liar_!" he yelled as he swung his robotic arm around to slap her face. She gasped as the artificial hand made contact with her face. The stinging brought tears to her eyes. She looked back at Anakin, confusion and hurt in her eyes. He was fuming. "If you wanted to end it, you should have said something instead of going behind my back!"

"But Anak-." Another slap.

"Do not lie to me! I know you were with him!"

"No, I wasn't!"

He raised his hand towards the mantel that held Padme's most prized possession: a book. Using the Force, he picked it up and threw it at her head. It struck hard and true, it's metal bindings around the corners slicing her cheek. he hit her again with his human hand. "I will not be lied to!" He physically picked up the book again and swung it across her face, causing her to fall to the ground. He continued to beat her as she grew dizzy. The last thing she remembered was hearing a voice that was not quite her own pleading with Anakin to stop...

* * *

"Senator Amidala? Are you alright?" 

A week had passed since the attack. She had desperately been avoiding Anakin, afraid that seeing her would cause him to hurt her again. She'd been meeting with Senators opposed to the Clone Wars as an excuse to keep Anakin out of the apartment. That's what she was doing right now.

"Excuse me, Senator Organa. I've been...distracted lately."

"We've noticed," stated Senator Mon Mothma. "We were just suggesting that we include the Jedi in the Petition. We know of your close friendship with Knight Skywalker, and we thought-"

"No!"

All nine members of the meeting turned to stare at her. They had expected that she would immediately accept to letting Skywalker know about their plan, so they were thrown off guard by her outburst.

"I'm sorry, fellow senators. Skywalker...he is too close to the Chancellor. If Palpatine were to discover this, it would be fatal to the organization," she said, trying to cover up her cry of distress. The others seemed to believe her, and Padme sighed inwardly with relief. The past few days, she had worked so hard to create the façade that she was perfectly normal; one false move could reveal everything, and she'd lose her job.

"We'll think of something else," reasoned Senator Motara Kethnal.

"Yes, we will. For now, though, let's call it a day. We'll meet again the day after tomorrow," said Bail Organa. He was used to being in charge. Not that anyone minded; he was fair and a good leader, the perfect head for an organization such as this.

The meeting adjourned and the senators filed out one by one, each thanking Padme in turn for her hospitality. Mon Mothma was the last to leave, and as the door hissed shut, Padme let out a sigh and closed her eyes. Even in the presence of others, she still felt alone. It was better to feel alone when she actually was.

_Well, I'm sitting alone thinking about it all over coffee.  
And still crowdin' my space are the things you still hold against me.  
You cannot save me. _

She walked to the kitchen and made herself a pot of coffee. The drink had always been able to soothe her when nothng else would. She inhaled the strong scent, allowing it to fill her senses. She let the breath out as a sigh, remembering something else she had to do. Padme stood up to head to the refresher. She had discovered a make-up that would hide her bruises that covered her face. the cut she had healed with bacta cream, but there was still a scar. It would probably be there for a while. The make-up worked effectively, but if it was left on too long, her face would break out. Padme dipped her head into the sink and gently began to wash of her face. Patting her face dry with a towel, she returned to the kitchen, grabbed her coffee cup and went to the living room to relax. She knew she was on the verge of breakdown everyday, and sitting and relaxing seemed to help that from ocurring. Sipping on her drink, she settled herself into a comfortable position on the couch. She looked around the room. Although it was too formal for her taste, within the past few years, it had become home to her. Her gaze returned to the coffee table in front of her, and she gasped. There, on the table, was the book. A tear slipped past her wall of defense as she picked up the book. She didn't know what it was, but something told her that if she didn't read the book, the pain would never leave her. So she opened the book.

_Read it all, no need for separating here.  
You see what you want and try to justify  
All your little lines,  
Convictions and your lies.  
What right do you have to point at me? _

'The planet of Naboo was discovered in the year 286 by Jedi Master Noraa Ranarra. The planet was so strong with the Force that she decided to make Naboo a meditational planet for all troubled Jedi...'

* * *

_Well, it's not the time to breakdown.  
It's not the time to breakdown.  
It's not the time to break up this love,  
Keep it together now.  
It's not the time to break. _

Padme didn't know how long it had taken; all she knew was that she was finished, and the burden was somewhat easier to bear. She sighed contentedly as she closed the book. Looking at the chrono on the wall, she realized it was five at night. She made to go to the bedroom when suddenly the door chime signaled. Padme froze in fear; was Anakin finally coming back? She went to the comm that was stationed by the door and spoke into it. "Hello? Who is it?"

"Padme, it's Obi-Wan. Are you alright?"

She let out her breath in relief as she unlocked the door. "Obi-Wan! It's so good to see you. Please come in. How are you?"

The Jedi Master had his head bowed in respect, and when he responded he looked up. "I'm doing fi-." He stopped short, and Padme curiously turned to face him. His blue-gray-green eyes were filled with horror as they roamed her face, resting on her cheek. "Oh, _Padme_," he breathed. "What happened to you?"

It was then that she remembered-she had taken her make-up off. Her body swiveled away from Obi-Wan as she muttered, "Nothing." Her feet carried her to the transparisteel window, and Obi-Wan followed silently. He laid a hand on her shoulder. "Padme, 'nothing' could not do this to you. What's going on? Is there something I need to know?"

Here was her test: she could tell Obi-Wan and risk losing her job, or she could keep quiet and lose her sanity from keeping everything bottled up inside. She made her decision within seconds. She couldn't keep Obi-Wan in the dark. He was the only friend she had left.

"Obi-Wan, I'm going to trust you with this. Come sit down with me." They made their way to the couch and Padme breathed in deeply. "The first thing you need to know...is that Anakin and I are married."

Obi-Wan nodded. "I know."

Padme knew that she should be surprised, but right now, nothing seemed to phase her. "Last week, though, something was different. I came home very late from a Senate session, and Anakin was up waiting for me. And he was angry. Angrier than I've ever seen him. He seemed to think that I was cheating on him...with you."

Obi-Wan was very shocked at this news. "Why in the _blazes_ would he think that?"

"Well, there may be two reasons. He said he commed you earlier that night and you didn't answer. Also...I think...I think that Anakin might have been drunk," she finished wearily.

The Jedi Master sighed and shook his head. "That explains his recent behavior. As for the night that he commed...my only explanation is that I couldn't sleep and I went to the Room of a Thousand Fountains to meditate. But, Padme, that doesn't explain how you ended up...like this. Don't shut me out; I _want_ to help you."

Padme looked away from her friend. This was the hardest part. Tears rose to her eyes as she drew in a shaky breath. "He beat me," she whispered.

The tears poured out as she verbally relived the night for Obi-Wan. She told him everything she could remember, from the lipstick smudge to the last slap in her memory. She told him about the book, and that's when the first cry of anguish left her mouth. After that, she lost control. Tears flowed like a river after a flood, and she was sobbing uncontrollably. The next thing she knew, she was in Obi-Wan's arms, weeping on his shoulder, holding him tighter and closer than she had ever held Anakin. Obi-Wan was stroking her back and hair softly, whispering reassurances that it was okay and that everything was going to be alright. Padme pulled back a bit and gave the man an apologetic look. "I'm sorry, Obi-Wan," she said, attempting to collect herself. "I-I lost control. Had a-a breakdown."

Obi-Wan gently gripped her shoulders. "Padme, I want you to listen to me _very_ carefully. Don't apologize for that. If anyone should be apologizing, it's Anakin. And he doesn't deserve forgiveness, after what he did. You needed to let that out. Don't be sorry," he said encouragingly, pulling her into a hug.

A few minutes later, she pulled back again. "Thank you, Obi-Wan. I needed that."

"Don't mention it."

_Open up the book you beat me with again.  
Read it off one sentence at a time. _

A silence filled the room. Not an uncomfortable silence, but not a welcome one either. Padme wanted to talk with him more, but Obi-Wan seemed perfectly content to stare at her coffee table. Then, without warning, he reached out to the table and grabbed the only thing sitting on it: the book. He must have felt or sensed Padme stiffen, because he looked up at her cautiously. "Is...is this the book...he used?" he questioned. She nodded, looking the other way. "Might I glance it over?" She granted him permission and waited a while as he skimmed the pages. After about five minutes, the book was set back in her lap, and she ran her fingers over its cover.

A hand placed itself over hers, and, slowly, she raised her chocolate brown eyes to meet his eyes that were as changing as the sea. "That is a beautiful book. It's a shame that it was used the way it was. I'd like to read it in full," Obi-Wan murmured, raising his finger to trace the scar on her cheek. "I'm sorry this had to happen to you of all people, Padme. I wish I could take away the pain that monster caused you."

_Well, it's not the time to breakdown.  
It's not the time to breakdown.  
It's not the time to break up this love,  
Keep it together now.  
It's not the time to break. _

"It's okay, Obi-Wan. I'm going to be fine. I'll heal. All it took was a breakdown."

And they pulled each other closer for a kiss...

* * *

Padme set back her shoulders with an air of finality. She had done what she came to Naboo to do. Looking down at the papers in her hand, she smiled sadl at the words printed on the bottom: Marriage Annulled. Two weeks ago, she had told Anakin that she wanted a divorce, and somehow, he had been okay with it. "I remember what I did," he had said soberly. "I deeply regret it, but I understand where you're coming from." 

The bruises on her face had faded away, but the scar was still there. The medical droid had told her that unless she wanted it surgically removed, the scar would remain there for the rest of her life. She immediately declined surgery; she was not going to pay any sum of money just to have a blemish removed.

She and Obi-Wan decided to end their relationship also, even though they both had strong feelings for each other. Being 'just friends' would be less detrimental for their lives, and they both agreed that their jobs were where they were needed most. They still had lunch together sometimes, talked and laughed about their lives, with an occasional kiss on the cheek goodbye, and nothing more. But Padme still loved him and trusted Obi-Wan with her life. And she knew that if she ever needed a shoulder to cry on, Obi-Wan would be there in a heartbeat for her breakdown.

* * *

Hope you enjoyed! 


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